.jpg)
While I was walking in this nice park-like area, I saw a huge pile of dog poo. And though right away, "thank goodness I was looking down!". Well, this made me think, and I've come to the conclusion that I am a foot-watcher. Instead of looking around and at the sky and trees and the beauty around me, I often just watch my feet. In the back of my mind, I'm hearing "watch where you're going Sheena, careful of your steps, watch out", and I've always just watched my feet. This has probably prevented me from quite a few accidents, since I can never walk quite straight, and I am a naturally clumsy person (i.e. Mexican fast food on gray/white skirt story).
I don't know when this foot-watching started. As a child, I never wore shoes, had cuts all over, and never thought twice about running on rocks barefoot. I remember some trouble I got myself into as a 9 year old, while taking a walk with my mom I got stuck in the mud, because I wasn't watching where I was going. I got stuck, and my mom left me to get myself out of the mess I got into. I finally did get myself out, after figuring out that frantically moving my legs and feet got me deeper in the mud, and I had to be more calm.
Anyways, this foot-watching syndrome applies to more of my life than just my walking habits. I try to be adventurous and step out, but in the back of my mind is still "watch where you're going Sheena, don't fail, don't walk in any poo". Do I really get a lot out of experiences if I'm continually watching just my feet? I am too cautious, and don't really live with all that I have to give. My fear prevents me from being used like I should.
I am determined now, with this new adventure in my life, to not be a foot-watcher any longer. I want to get all I can out of this new experience, to get all that I can out of what God is teaching me here. In the back of my head now are the voices of my former dance teachers, yelling at me to NOT watch my feet, that they are still there even if I'm not looking at them. Telling me to dance with my head held high, with a smile on my face, and light in my eyes. So I will walk (or dance), and soak it in, trusting that my feet will carry me. And who really cares about stepping in poo or stubbing a toe once in awhile if it means I can enjoy all there is to offer.
Psalm 121:2-3 My help comes from the LORD,
the Maker of heaven and earth.
He will not let your foot slip—
he who watches over you will not slumber.
3 comments:
Well said. I've felt that way for years, but one word of edification: You can spend yourself and serve in the wrong way, even as well intentioned and noble as they may seem. Hilary and I have invested ourselves in many years of serving others (in the church and outside), but God has shown us that unless you invest in relationship along with service, you will find that that service will leave you unfulfilled and empty. You reap what you sew, and if you only sew service, you won't reap relationships back.
Not saying you don't (I'm mean, come on... when was the last time I actually talked to you?), but just something God has brought to my attention. Yep, just as you said, you don't want to get to overwhelmed and busy... use that time to invest into others, and you'll see it come back into your life.
Hugs and kiss from your Montana cuz. Love you!
Sheena, you're rad! I'm so excited for your new adventures in SoCal and let me be real with you and say that there are no greater 2people you could be roomied with to share your new journey with. You have just entered one of the most wild times of your life and God knew what He was doing when He planted you at 60 Brownfield. =)
Why isn't writing your career, girl? You view life through a very interesting lens, both in writing and in photography. You are gifted and yes, God made you that way. Cautious is good. Make sure you hear His voice. He will take care of the fears you hang onto if you just let go.:) Wish I could be there with you!
Love,
Aunt Donna
Post a Comment